Will West Ham be the ones singing Carrolls come Christmas?

Andy Carroll is continually and unfairly criticised, with his £35million price tag held to his neck like an executioner’s axe. However, the six-foot-three brute emphasised his rare ability to dominate a football game on his West Ham United debut, after he moved from Liverpool on loan, yes on loan, until the end of the season.

The rugged front-man created two goals and countless more opportunities on his first start for his new team as they beat Fulham 3-0 on Saturday.

Reckon his previous employers are already rueing the decision to let him go?

Carroll is a physical specimen. He is unstoppable in the air; he is mobile, freakishly strong and possesses power in his left foot akin to Thor’s hammer.

Premier League 2012-13: Opening weekend review

This week we had some staffing/technical issues so this weekend review is a little late, but just as good for a memory jog before you tweak you fantasy teams and make your predictions for this weekend’s fixtures.

It’s also the first by our now regular columnist @J_Wattsy who we’d like to give a warm welcome to. Do leave him your comments, suggestions for future columns and let us know what you think. 

Euro 2012 Betting Guide 3

In our third betting guide, our resident experts talks you through his tips for the quarter-finals…

Cristiano Ronaldo was sensational against the Dutch in Portugal’s final group game. He’s the best European footballer in the world and he always creates chances for himself. His two goals against Holland put him bang in contention to be the tournament’s top goal-scorer.

The team that has impressed me the most so far is Ronaldo’s Portugal. They are extremely dangerous going forward with Ronaldo and Nani on either wing and while Helder Postiga struggles in front of goal, he’s good with his back to the posts.

Guest Blog: What’s your favourite chant? [part5 – FINALE]

Today’s entry brings to the end our series of chant blogs – we hope you’ve enjoyed reminiscing about funny songs past and present. We always want input from readers, so please do leave a comment with any thoughts or any genius chants we haven’t thought of.

There were some brilliant chants from Arsenal’s heyday in my early teens, some of the best including: “He’s blond, he’s quick, his name’s a porno flick, Emmanuel, Emmanuel” about the midfield supremo Manu Petit, and “We love you Freddie, because you’ve got red hair, we love you Freddie because you’re everywhere, we love you Freddie, you’re Arsenal through and through” (and later when he shaved his head updated to “We love you Freddie, because you’ve got no hair”). Other favourites include “We are staying up, we are staying up” early this season as a sarcastic riposte to all the early-season haters, and “Chelsea, Chelsea, money can’t buy you history”, sung repeatedly on the most squashed tube journey I’ve ever experienced on the way back from Fulham Broadway last month.

One more (an offer from Gerts as it happens, who says this is one of our best songs – I also think he enjoyed me singing it today as we ate lasagne in the work canteen): “Lasagne, woooooah, lasagne, woooooooah, we laughed ourselves to bits, when Tottenham got the sh*ts.” Genius.

In terms of the best by other fans, I took a trip to Loftus Road when QPR played Hull in May, at the end of the Championship season and enjoyed “Taarabt’s too good for you”. I also enjoyed “We were here when we were sh*t”, but as a tourist for the day, I couldn’t sing that with much credibility!

I also recall enjoying the tune to “Darren Bent is as fast as lightning, Darren Bent is a red and white, he gets the ball and he scores a goal, he’s f*ckin dynamite” at an away trip to Sunderland in November 2009. However given Bent then scored to send us on our way to a 1-0 defeat, I think I like it less now!

Are we all dreaming of the Premier League?

A recent email exchange between the Water Cooler editors threw up an interesting question – are even the lowest amateur teams hoping to be repeatedly promoted until they reach the bright lights of our top division? In a world of overpaid prima donnas, managerial merry go rounds, foreign ownership, stadiums named after international brands and inflated transfer prices – do we still ALL dream of the Premier League? @GWoffer believes so, whilst Jack disagrees…